The Curse of Self Reflection

cznewlands
May 27, 2015
3 min read

Get rid of your rear view mirror. Seriously, it’s not doing anything to help you!

Now you probably think I am crazy but I am not talking about the mirror in your car. I am talking about the mirror you keep looking at - inside your head.

When you get in your car, notice that the rear view mirror in much smaller than the windshield.

Although obviously I am not encouraging you to drive wholeheartedly forward without ever looking into your rear view mirror (please don’t do that, that’s stupid and dangerous) but I am telling you that what is in front of you is so much more important than what is behind you.

Your PAST has PASSED, it is over - your past does not and never will define your future.

It is a cruel trick of nature that us humans often obsess on the past and revel in the negative energy of moments we wish went differently or that we could change. Newsflash - that is absolutely not going to happen.

It is more than okay to glance into the past and learn lessons - what is life without learning and education? However, learn your triggers, learn the choices, learn to see the pattern of the past and the moments you wish to change but instead of changing the past, be like the wind and change direction.

Deny what you wish, but we all know our triggers. There is an “aha” moment in everyone who starts to head back towards the dark of yesterday only to put yourself back into the amnesic state. “On no, here we go” - a perpetual groundhog day for the rest of your life unless you CHANGE your pattern.

Choose the right path.

Humans are creators by nature - we are always creating. Creating beauty, innovation, and of course creating chaos but a lesson learned is that you cannot re-create the past. The past may have been fantabulous but we don’t have magic, you still can’t go there again.

But remember the feeling of it: Why was it good? What was it about that situation/that job/that relationship that was so sensational?

Use that as your compass.

Know that you can create another fabulous job/relationship/ be in great health by seeing it in front of you through your windshield.

Make that your destination and put your “peddle to the metal,” fixate your eyes to whats ahead of you and DON’T get side tracked by the “It can’t happen agains,” the “I don’t deserve it” or the “It’s too lates.” You know all the crap we tell ourselves on a day to day basis. You have the map, it’s your GPS - you are the one in control and it’s your choice - left or right? wrong or right? forward not back.

Don’t focus on what’s behind you, no one is going that way. It just really isn’t possible (and it doesn’t ever work out in time travelling movies either…)

Get excited about what is in FRONT of you.

Don’t hack off that rear view mirror altogether, but use it sparingly..and ONLY to remember the thoughts you need to retrieve to enjoy the ride to your “perfect” destination.